Prayer

I noticed that I've been judging the days of this past week -- how they all started, up to how they ended. Everyday, I start my mornings with joy and dreams, but I grew frail to reality. Everyday, there was a contrast, and I always let the sun go down over my anger and frustration. . . All I wanted was a day where I did everything right.

Yesterday was my answered prayer. It was the most hectic, the most challenging day of my week. I was at the brink of failing my tests for the day, I wasn't able to fulfill the goals I set, I got scolded, I got someone else scolded, I stayed in school until 8:00pm for rehearsals; tired, exhausted, frustrated. I was going home with another disappointing day. . .

Then I saw the moon, full, but dressed with black clouds. I saw streetlights sharply illuminated, and heard a siren and a variety of honks from jeepnies and cars.

But backed away from all that, was a sound of silence. And as I stared at the moon, it was as if its silence was quiet enough to reach all the chaos of this world, and still exist. Sooner or later, all I heard was the steady drops of rain landing on the roof of the car. When I got home, I saw the lights still sharp and illuminated, with the visible rays reaching only a certain point, but its glow all over the streets, just like how I saw it through the window of the car, I just thought I wouldn't be able to see it any other way. It was real, peaceful, dusty, gloomy. The rain was still pouring, but I couldn't stop admiring the silent moon.

The day didn't have to be right, and it was quite impossible for it to reach perfection. Where does happiness come from? I just wanted to be.

29.9.07 05:12